One touch


That’s what I needed. A sense of having you around. Forever, next to me. I felt the need of your fingers running through my body.  I needed the feeling of being home. Something you could never give me. Stability, the sense of belonging. Was I a caprice?  Was I something disposable? I always thought you don’t give up on someone you love. It seems we both have different views about that.

I often think about you like a mystery. I never knew too much about you. I’ve never been able to figure out your next move. This is what costed me in the end. As you left me empty, with a feeling of disguise. It’s the one moment when you believe in yourself, you built up an idea, a vision of a future with someone, and within seconds, he’s gone. That’s what I felt. I know no-one else will see me the way you saw myself. I will make sure nobody will ever be able to see through my real feelings. In front of you, I feel naked of my thoughts, of my weaknesses, and I don’t seem to be able to help it in any way.

Hopefully, in time, I will be able to look at you without any feelings, without any regrets. Hate was never an option, it will be impossible for me to hate a human being that showed me what love felt like. You were the person that held my heart in his hand, and didn’t know what to with it, so you decided to let down. All of a sudden. My path only goes one way now. Without any disruption from you again. You never had any deserving of me.And I am happy because I have finally been able to see through the real you; a ghost of the past.

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